9 Ways to Co-Create a Better Future
Revealing the fractal yin-yang zoom and embracing our power.
In yesterday’s essay, I explained fractals and how they influence our understanding of complexity. I also believe they’re a great representation of conflict. As part of my fractal yin-yang, I’m using the Mandelbrot set. I asked my fractal friend, Mitch Goldberg, to create an awesome zoom video, which you can check out here:
(This video starts on the fractal zoom timestamp, so you don’t have to look for it, you can just enjoy its beauty.)
Thank you for your amazing work, Mitch!
The Mandelbrot set is a map of other fractals. Each pixel is a coordinate, representing something that does one of two things: Either the recursive process makes the number bigger, and it goes toward infinity, or the number gets smaller and moves toward zero.
Everything you see in black will move toward zero, and everything in color is trending toward infinity. We're looking at this fractal yin-yang as a map of human choices over time in different contexts. The stuff in black is what we don’t do, and the colored area measures the things we definitely do.
The color gradation indicates the likelihood of us doing something, almost like a heatmap. If this map is a repetition of millions of people making bazillions of choices, it's no surprise that there's a super detailed wiggly line in the middle of our yin-yang.
How does this relate to conflict?
If conflict is a fractal, we might notice that it looks similar at all scales. We can think about these fractal patterns as different cultures and subcultures clustering around the perennial topics of debate.
Whether the issues are guns, the environment, police, justice, crime, or whatever we're talking about, there are patterns in our values. That's true even as we cut across cultures and groups.
A recursive algorithm creates the dance of self and other. What's good for us? What's good for the group? That tension is present in every question we ask. It's tempting to want to establish our line in a simple and black-or-white way. However, our values form the overall texture while our actions define it.
Because many different people take various actions in nuanced, complex situations, we couldn’t draw the line with a ruler or any detail. That’s why it's infinitely complex.
How does this affect our political system?
First, our democracy is designed to be ongoing and balance two perspectives: The old way and the new way, conservative and progressive. It’s iterative, holds tension, and consists of hundreds of millions of people. Democracy is you, me—all of us.
We're never going to have laws that are an accurate description of this space. Instead, we can view laws as rough sketches that catch the general texture of the line, with rights that protect us and prohibitions that steer us away from disaster.
As we zoom out a bit more, it's worth recognizing that this is the whole human experience. We will never sort out what is happening once and for all, but we control the simple algorithm that generates it.
We need to let go of the illusion that anyone is going to win or lose. If we can manage a generative, ongoing process, we can keep this going for a long time. That could be really beautiful.
How can we keep life and all its wonders going?
First, we have to realize there aren't any fixed outcomes. This reminds me of finite and infinite games. (Simon Sinek has a great video on infinite games.)
A finite game has a finish line, and the purpose of playing a finite game is to win. An infinite game is played for the very purpose of continuing for as long as we can. We don't want to get to the end any sooner than is necessary.
How we play the game of life or democracy is more valuable than anything specific that happens. That takes the pressure off the things we can't control.
So, how can we make this whole experience less painful? How can we craft a game that everyone wants to keep playing?
Creating an infinite game
We have different strategies for the simplicity that lies on the other side of complexity. Thankfully, we're no longer dealing with an oversimplification. While this new reality may feel harder, it’s profoundly beneficial. However, there are certain things we need to do.
One thing is shifting our attention from fighting and trying to defeat our enemies. We need to focus on the problem binding us. Every problem mutually affects us, and everyone who's affected by it needs to work on solving it together.
Another thing that we can do is let go of this right versus wrong and actually focus on what’s at the heart of the issue. By doing that, we can establish shared criteria to give us a way to come to a shared understanding about what better or worse look like.
While that may sound crazy, it’s possible and necessary. Those guidelines can help us navigate this complexity together and alone when we're trying to decide how we want to behave in any given situation.
Another lesson from all of this is that we need to embrace our inherent interconnectedness that is all about us and them. Our web of relationships includes our enemies because we can’t simply separate ourselves from the people we don’t like.
If we are all involved in the problem, we must also share responsibility for repairing it. We can do that by taking responsibility for clearing the obstacles in our lives. When we engage and connect with people, it's crucial to think about how we can deepen and improve our relationships.
How can we get to know each other better?
Discovering what makes each other tick is one of the best ways to do that, especially since we need to improve our communication skills. That basically means learning how to speak and listen more effectively.
As we interact with people and try to deliberate, think together, make decisions, and take action, we need to include everyone in the process. We must do this at all scales—individually, in groups, politically, and interculturally.
If that feels like too much and you need more time before bridging across differences, start where you are. Even if you just need to deal with internal conflicts inside yourself, go for it. Any improvement is better than no improvement. If you're ready to go, dig into deep political issues and engage with people who think differently from you. Please, we all need it!
As there aren't any final outcomes, we need to focus on improving the quality of the process we use to make decisions. This aspect is easy to overlook. It's so much easier to focus on trying to control people, get people to change their minds, or exclude those we don't like. But as long as we have a win-lose process, we'll have winners and losers.
We need processes that create win-win outcomes and the unity that comes with that. If we can develop new approaches to benefit everyone, it'll change the entire dynamic of our politics, conflict, and diversity. Given that conflict and life are recursive processes, we need to ensure that our strategies for managing conflict are also recursive.
We need a replicable algorithm that we can use over and over to make everything easier, smoother, and less painful. Maybe even more joyful and awesome.
Does that sound like too much to you? Well, I am excited to tell you that it is not too much. We have abundant answers to this issue, and I can’t wait to tell you about them.
What's coming next?
Going forward, I'm starting a new series where I'll be detailing the amazing tools at our disposal.
For now, I'm going to say that I recognize this simplicity on the far side of complexity is not easy. But I choose to give my life to it because it's an accurate understanding of our situation.
It's up to each of us to choose how we respond to the world's complexity. Oversimplifying will lead to more polarization, while engaging with complexity and recognizing that we won't find simple solutions is the key to something better. Holding that dance of our agency and interdependence will help us improve our relationships and make us demand inclusivity in our democracy.
If you want to learn how to communicate better, please check out my podcast episode with David Brubaker. We talk about what leadership looks like in the face of polarization, and he shares his four-part secret to communicating across differences.
Coming soon, I'll talk more about complexity and interdependence. I'm going to kick off that whole new series by talking about how we can put this sense of interdependence into practice.
We're at the edge of time. We are crafting the future, and it's up to us to choose a new way of responding to the complexity of our conflicts. Thank you for wanting to co-create a better future. Don’t forget to subscribe if you haven’t already; there’s some super stuff coming up.
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